So where have I been the last few weeks?
Oh just growing a baby inside me!
That’s right! Despite multiple years of nothing happening, multiple doctors saying no, multiple failed fertility tests, multiple times of hearing you will never have kids unless you just go ahead with surrogacy…I am naturally and miraculously pregnant!
My infertility may have led me to my prolife work and inspired me to fight for life but don’t think that my passion for advocacy will disappear with my infertility. I’m more certain now than I ever have been before that life begins 9 months before birth.
Me and my new miracle baby will use our testimony to reach and save as many lives as possible!
So now that you know why I’ve been laying low I want to share a few things about the journey so far!
My baby’s had a nickname from the moment I saw the pink line, and it’s completely intentional. I cannot stand hearing people refer to unborn babies as “it’s” and I refuse to call my baby an it. Why do we do that anyways? When is it due? Is it a boy or girl? Is it kicking yet? Maybe if we spoke of the unborn with more respect and acknowledgement it wouldn’t be so easy for others to dismiss them as less than human lives. If we call our babies it’s, people will treat them like its and not real individual people. So we gave our baby a nickname from day one! We learned I was pregnant at about 4 weeks, when the baby was only the size of a Poppyseed, so from that moment on we’ve called our baby Poppy! I even have family and friends using the name too! So if at anytime in the future you hear me refer to Poppy you know I’m talking about my little miracle baby.
It’s not as difficult as I’ve been led to believe!
I’m always hearing from people how incredibly hard it is for women to carry a child. People say it’s so much work, the physical toll is a common reason for termination. I hear from prochoicers all the time who claim women shouldn’t put their body through such “trauma”.
Well maybe I’m just really lucky but compared to what I was expecting, this has been a walk in the park! Yeah I’m exhausted, and yeah I usually get sick at least once a day, and yeah my sleeping and eating habits are out of whack but considering what I’m getting out of all the effort…it’s so worth it!
Obviously I’m only a third of the way through it but they say the first is the worst and if that’s the case, I have no complaints at all.
Hope all my mom to be friends and family are having as great of a time so far as I am!
All of those protective maternal instincts are instant!
From the moment I found out about Poppy my priorities changed and I instantly stopped thinking about myself. I had tried to stop smoking before, many times and always with no success, well I haven’t even touched a cigarette since I found out I was pregnant and it was the easiest decision ever. I love coffee and would drink at least 1 pot a day, now I drink maybe 1/2 a cup if that and it’s no big deal. I’m not a big eater especially early in the day but now I’m not feeding me, I’m feeding my baby so I have no problem getting myself to eat earlier than I used too. I stopped sleeping on my stomach the day I found out because I’d rather be uncomfortable than risk squishing Poppy! Yes I’m being very very overly cautious, but after 5 years of being told you can’t have kids you would be too! Basically there was an instant switch and I’m no longer my main priority. Everything I do, I do for my baby. Poppy is the most important priority for me and my husband, nothing else and no one else could top our miracle baby.
My husband Shawn is just as excited as I am!
I’ve always been big on paternal rights and making sure dads have a place in their kids lives. I know from my experience of having the best dad ever that it really does mean a lot to a child to have a dad who says I love you. So many people think all the guy does is “have a few minutes of fun” and then his job is over and the woman has all the hard work to do. Well I just don’t see it like that. Since Poppy came into the picture Shawn has been working even harder than usual. Not only is he going to work to financially support me and our baby he is also picking up slack around the house that I don’t have the energy to do. He’s more concerned with my safety and Poppy’s health than anything else and everything he does is to make our life better. If I’m craving something he will go get it no questions asked. If my back hurts he rubs it. He checks on me every time I get sick. I knew he would be involved and excited but I had no idea he would feel an instant connection to Poppy too! Everyday before and after work I get a kiss on the tummy and he talks to the baby and says I love you! It’s awesome to see the father and child connection start before birth! Knowing how much Shawn loves Poppy makes me so sad for all the dads who never get the chance to tell their unborn baby they love them. I will certainly never take my baby daddy for granted!
Everybody knows everything!
This is definitely a joke. I’ve already got a flood wave of advice from the obvious ‘don’t eat swordfish or sushi’ to the extremely personal ‘you need to do genetic testing’.
Basically if someone’s had a kid, read a book, or even watched a movie, they feel they have all the answers to everything you haven’t even asked! I was warned about the advice monsters that come out during pregnancy and early years of parenting but I’m shocked at how quickly that monster came out of the closet. I’m just barely at the 2nd trimester and I’ve already been told what I need to do during delivery 6+ months from now! While I appreciate the advice and I love that people want to be involved I just don’t have time to listen to everybody’s idea of what’s right for me and my family. So just a heads up to all my readers, unless I ask just don’t bother with the “do this don’t do that” lists. I have too many coming in to read them all and I will probably just end up listening to my gut and my mother…they haven’t failed me yet!
The people who said it will be the greatest time of your life were absolutely correct.
Even though the physical aspects are taxing I’ve never felt better or happier. It’s not even on purpose I’m just so in love with this baby! I don’t care if I’m sick or exhausted or if I have already gained 7 pounds, it’s all so wonderful to experience! I’m just enjoying every moment for what it is. I never thought I’d feel life growing inside of me and now that I get to I’m taking advantage of every single part of it. I can’t wait to see Poppy face to face but even now I’m beyond thrilled because I’m already a mom! My baby is already alive and unique and smiling. My baby already knows me like I know them. Just typing it gives me tears in my eyes because it is the most incredible and amazing time I’ve ever experienced. As much as I wish I could see Poppy tomorrow I hope this next 6 months goes by slowly so I can truly enjoy what a blessing it is to be pregnant. I know so many women wish they could experience this, I was one of them, so I refuse to look at pregnancy as anything other than a complete blessing!
So by much surprise and with grateful hearts we head into the 2nd trimester! Poppy is due July 26th, my dads birthday, how fun!
I will try and keep everyone updated on our journey but I will be keeping the majority of my blog posts to the typical Prolife content. So don’t think my pregnancy will interfere with my fight for life because it won’t!
I will certainly be sharing some more in depth information about my previous battle with infertility and how we chose God over science, and how that’s paid off so keep an eye out for that incredible story to come!
If anyone has questions or wants to know more about us and our many years of waiting to finally get here feel free to comment or email and ask away!
Lastly I wanted to say thank you to all of you who have prayed for us and supported us through these past few years of loss and challenges. I’m so happy to say those prayers have been answered and we can’t wait to meet our miracle Poppy in July!